Tagline: "WARNING! Joey Faust, escaped convict, THE AMAZING TRANSPARENT MAN, has vowed to "appear" invisibly IN PERSON at every performance of this picture!" Well, that should be pretty hard to dispute.
First, a few words about the title: Douglas Kennedy (left), the actor who played the lead, was not completely "transparent", you could see parts of him from time to time and at one point he flickered in and out like our old TV set used to when I was a boy. My Dad used to walk over and smack the side of the set to get it to stay on. My Dad wasn't around during the filming of this, so there's one problem. When he was "transparent" I would hesitate to refer to his actions or the special effects as "amazing". But I suppose it does have a better ring than "The Ludicrous Semi-Invisible Man", so there you go. In summary, neither Amazing nor Transparent....which I guess leaves us with the title "The Man", which in all fairness to the creators wouldn't attract the audience they were looking for.
Plot: A former Major in the army (top right) with delusions of grandeur has forced scientist Peter Ulof (top middle) to develop a radiation-based technique to turn men invisible. He plans to create an invisible army to sell to the country with the most dough to blow. He breaks out of prison a safecracker (Joey Faust) forcing him to undergo the invisibility treatment so Faust can steal more radioactive stuff to further the experimentation. Plans go awry when Faust discovers there is a side-effect to the invisibility treatments he didn't count on. Namely, he has only weeks to live. Throw in a scruples-deficient woman (bottom left) with a thing for bad boys and a former lawman with a rifle (the guy with the rifle) doing the Major's bidding and you've got yourself a crappy movie. Problem: turns out jailed safe-crackers don't always make the best decisions and once "transparent" Faust decides to rob a bank in broad daylight. Which goes okay until the bank guard sees a bag of money floating away and tries to stop it's exit. Then Faust begins to reappear and has to take it on the lam, see? Sorry, my inner gangster came to the surface. He and the broad who likes 'em rotten decide they have enough money to split, (or at least she invites herself along). It's right about then that the Major realizes using a criminal to carry out his orders may not be a simple as it seems.
I have a few issues with this movie and I will now list them, so pay attention because there's a quiz at the end of this post!
The Major utilizes blackmail to enlist the help of all of his cohorts, which is fine but why is he so surprised when they all turn on him?
People flip-flop with their allegiances in the blink of an eye in this movie. The former sherriff is the Major's stalwart hired gun, because he believes the Major holds his son hostage. Until the Bad Girl tells him his son is actually dead. Ten seconds later he's on their side. Do you suppose she might be lying because you were pointing a rifle at her?
The director takes great pains to point out that a lead-lined safe filled with (insert radioactive material here) is kept right beside the high-powered doo-hickey that could blow us all to Hell.....twice! Okay! Okay! We get it! You're going to blow everyone up at the end! Sheesh!
The scientist's daughter is locked in a room right next to where he slaves for the Major. Now, this isn't a metal door or boobie-trapped with explosives. It's just a door. Break it the Hell down and run with your daughter, you silly git!
After everyone is blown to bits....oh, sorry: SPOILER ALERT! After everyone is blown to bits, the scientist, who has escaped with his newly freed daughter, engages in a rambling diatribe concerning the power of nuclear energy and how it is our duty as a free society to reign in our governments and ensure the safety of our children. He ends his rant (and the movie) by looking directly into the camera and asking the movie-goer what he or she would do. A lovely setiment poorly written, poorly acted and tacked on to the end; sticking out like a sore thumb and destroying any semblance of interest in the world of pretend that is supposed to be a movie.
Things I learned from this movie: 1- in the opening credits, a person named Kevin Kelly is shown to play "Woman".....ohhhh-kay, 2- I have a bad feeling the writer chose the name "Faust" in reference to the German story of a man who makes a deal with the Devil; that story will NEVER be mistaken for this turkey, 3- when escaping a federal prison be sure to keep your prison-issued hat on your head....y'know, so everyone can easily see you're an escaped felon, 4- at a checkstop, police will not wake a "sleeping" man to check his I.D. because that would be rude, 5- after inventing an invisibilty ray there is no need to simply patent it and makes billions of dollars, instead set forth a half-baked plan to take over the world, 6- when guarding a dangerous criminal, always sit with your back to the door,
7- getting bashed over the head with a bottle will not cave your skull in like an over-ripe tomato but instead lightly stun you until you have a chance (60 seconds later) to dry off your uninjured head, 8- perhaps selecting criminals and people of loose morals is not the best way to ensure success.
My rating: way, way worse than Claude Rains' Invisible Man, way worse than Kevin Bacon's Hollow Man, about the same as Chevy Chase's Memoirs Of An Invisible Man. Unfortunately, not "transparent" enough.
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